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Fear of Mingling

This Is How to Answer the Phone

By Bull Garlington

As more workers return to their offices, they will face IRL challenges one simply doesnโ€˜t deal with at home. One of them is answering the phone โ€” specifically, oneโ€™s office phone. These bulky ancient devices perch on the edge of your desk, and when they ring, your soul will leave your body and your fingers will clench through the fiberboard edges of your desk.

It is monstrous. It rings like a car alarm and you have to answer it. But how?

how to answer the phone

Answering the Phone Is a Serious Point of Anxiety

Just go to r/anxiety on Reddit and scroll down through the endless entries with titles like โ€œAnswering the phone is the bane of my existence!โ€ and โ€œAnswer Phone How? NO!โ€ People hate it. Theyโ€™ve been dodging calls from the safety of their kitchen table for the last four years. Back in the office, thereโ€™s no way theyโ€™re going to answer a blind call on that plastic dinosaur of a phone. Why so many buttons!? Where is the screen? Siri? SIRI!

How to Answer the Phone Is a Question That Vexes Gen Xers

In much of the professional landscape of Generation X, telephobia reigns with a spiked glove. Until facing that faceless contraption in the office, the new professionals just used their cells and knew exactly who was calling. They could answer friendsโ€™ calls any way they wanted. They could send unknowns to voice mail. They could stare at the incoming call and think, โ€œWhy the hell donโ€™t they text?โ€

Science backs this up. A 2019 study from AB labs showed that answering a call from an unknown number took an insane amount of effort. If youโ€™re wondering if this applies to you since you donโ€™t have social anxiety but still have a hard time answering the phone, the answer is yes. Telephobia is not necessarily part of a larger social anxiety, but a condition all by itself.

Telephopia is less about the anxiety of the actual call than it is about the basket of unknowables that come with a call. All you have to go on is the sound of the callerโ€™s voice โ€” and to be clear, itโ€™s the sound reproduced for you through the telephone. You canโ€™t see their face. They canโ€™t send an emoji to clarify. You have to guess if theyโ€™re being funny or weird or if theyโ€™re mad or if they donโ€™t like you, or … I think I need to lie down.

Itโ€™s also about the pressure of being live. You can take all the time you want to answer a text. But if you freeze in a call to think about what youโ€™re going to say, the other person is likely to misunderstand that silence or, worse, take it as a cue to keep talking.

But now these same call deniers are at work where they are required to snatch that receiver off its cradle when it rings, whether or not caller ID is available. If you employ Gen Xers, do yourself a favor and be patient with their awkward answering.

In the meantime, here are some helpful hints for those of you who suffer.

Hello? Hereโ€™s How to Answer the Phone

Flip-phone, iPhone or desk phone, hereโ€™s help conquering phone-answering anxiety.

via Giphy Dwight Shrute answering The Office phone

Keep It Simple

Just say hello. You donโ€™t have to think about it, and itโ€™s pretty standard. This puts the burden of identification on the caller who must navigate their own clumsy opening line. Below, youโ€™ll see some hacks with notes and stickies and such, but right here at the top of the story is the quickest, easiest, least anxious method for how to answer the phone:

Just say hello.

Go Formal With Your Deets

Another tried-and-true method for answering the phone is to go with the name of the firm or your department or jail cell or whatever. Try this:

  • Hello, International Turtle Breeders of America, Candice speaking.
  • This is Candice of the National Picture Straightenerโ€™s Union, Local 803.
  • Accounts Malleable, Lorraine speaking.

Just Use Your Name

Again, weโ€™re talking the easiest, most informative and simple method. You know who you are. Nothing to memorize here.

  • This is Lorraine.
  • Lorraine speaking.
  • Hello, this is Lorraine.

Or Use Theirs

If your desk phone has caller ID, answering should be easier, except itโ€™s not. Again, saying โ€œhelloโ€ is perfectly safe and acceptable. Senior partner or your best pal, keep it professional and avoid other one-word answers like โ€œyeah?โ€ or โ€œwhatโ€ or โ€œhey.โ€ Somebody else may be using your friendโ€™s phone. Consider:

  • Hi Chris, how are you?
  • Hi Chris, nice to hear from you.

Company Mandatory Answer Templates

Your firm may have a standard way to answer the phone. (Weโ€™ve all watched โ€œSuits.”) If youโ€™re nervous about nailing it, write the script on a sticky note, stick it to your monitor and read it every time you answer the phone.

Practice How to Answer the Phone

This may sound silly, kind of like role playing to get your sales pitch right. But role playing is brilliant and practicing answering the phone is equally effective. You might want to do it at home so you donโ€™t disrupt the workspace. But just, well, answer the phone. Go through all the motions. Pick up a fake receiver (unless you have an actual tabletop phone) and say your line. Do it nine hundred and eighty-seven million times. Or three or four times a day for a week. Do it until answering the phone is second nature โ€” until you donโ€™t even think about it.

But Itโ€™s a Recruiter and Iโ€™m Losing My Mind!

Chill. Every recruiter knows that everyone they talk to is nervous and anxious. Itโ€™s part of their job. Theyโ€™re trained in how to recognize and relieve your anxiety. Besides, being anxious on a recruitment call is normal. Itโ€™s real. Answer the call. Let the awkward roll.

But Wait, How Do I End the Call?

This is just as hard as answering the phone. How do you tap out? If you find yourself at the end of your presentation, pitch or whatever conversation youโ€™re in, itโ€™s time to finish. Itโ€™s important to have a clear, defined stop to a call; otherwise, you fade out, as if youโ€™re talking to your cousin from Indiana who wonโ€™t shut up about the Pacers. All the work youโ€™ve put into your pitch wonโ€™t matter if the end of your call is vague and lingering.

Donโ€™t Do That, Do This

  1. Indicate the call is over.
  2. Commit to a follow-up if required.
  3. Say thank you.
  4. Say goodbye.
  5. HANG UP.

Hereโ€™s what it sounds like:

โ€œAlright, Steve, this has been a great call. Iโ€™ll get back to you by next Thursday. Thank you for your time. (Steve will say something here). Talk to you soon.โ€ CLICK.

What If They Wonโ€™t Stop Talking?

You may find yourself stuck at the end of a call with someone with a slow fade. They linger and hang on and meander and repeat all the points youโ€™ve already made. Thereโ€™s no need to be curt or rude, but you have 43 other calls to make, and then thereโ€™s that pickleball game on the roof at 4 p.m., so you need to jet. Steve is still talking, so hereโ€™s what you should do.

โ€œSteve โ€” hey, this is fascinating, and I want to keep this conversation going, but I have a call in three minutes. Iโ€™ll call you back on Thursday. Thanks. Talk to you soon.โ€ HANG UP.

What If I Canโ€™t Stop Talking?

When youโ€™re rambling, thereโ€™s always that moment of metacognition when you realize youโ€™re talking as youโ€™re thinking. Oh lord, oh crap, shut up! When that happens, then just shut up. You donโ€™t have to apologize for rambling, though if you do, thatโ€™s OK (but itโ€™s just more rambling). Just stop talking, take a breath and then go into your goodbye schtick (see above).

I Answered and Goodbyeโ€™d โ€” Now What?

Hereโ€™s where you can shine. If this was a call from a recruiter, a potential employer, a cherished or potential client, or anyone else you wish to impress just a little bit, then send them a card. Not an email. Anyone can do that. Theyโ€™ll trash it before they read the re-line. No, be different. Stand out. Send a card.

Image ยฉ iStockPhoto.com.

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Categories: Communications Skills, Fear of Mingling, People Skills
Originally published August 28, 2024
Last updated September 2, 2024
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BULL Garlington Bull Garlington

Analog Attorney columnistย Bull Garlington is an award-winning author, columnist and public speaker. He is the author of the books “Fat in Paris,” “The Full English,” “Death by Children” and “The Beat Cop’s Guide.” He prefers South American literature, classic jazz, Partagas 1945s, a decent Laphroaig, and makes a mean chicken and andouille gumbo. Follow him @bull_garlington.

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