We like to believe that if we do everything well, our clients will always love us, but it’s just not true. Here are 10 steps to soothe an angry client.
You know the scenario. It’s the end of the day. The phone rings, and you know you should just let it go to voicemail, pack up your laptop, and go home. But you answer and hear:
“What the bleep is this?”
It’s your angry client. The one for whom you’ve worked like a dog, around the clock, for the past two weeks. It seems this month’s bill has arrived, and he’s in flames!
Now what? First, take a beat, and breathe. Then try NOT to:
- Argue with him about it.
- Tell him it is someone else’s fault.
- Ask him to call you back tomorrow.
- Hang up on him.
Sometimes your lawyer training works exactly against you when you are confronted by a client. (Or your spouse, your assistant, a delivery driver, a pharmacist.) These are not situations to be won or lost. You can claim success when you calm the client and neutralize the conflict.
What Do You Want When You’re the Angry Client?
So, after taking that breath, ask yourself what the client wants. You’ve been angry about a service provider’s performance before. You’ve seethed over a perceived slight. What did you want? It’s one or more things from a fairly standard list:
- To be listened to.
- To be treated with respect.
- To be taken seriously.
- An immediate response.
- To make sure it doesn’t happen again.
- To avoid blame from someone else in your organization.
How to Respond, Calmly, to an Angry Client
Research has shown that first impressions are 55% visual cues (body language), 38% vocal (tone of voice), and only 7% verbal (words). One expert estimates that the percentages shift significantly when you communicate over the phone, to 82% vocal and 18% verbal.
So when you respond to your client, it is critical to modulate your voice to communicate concern, patience and caring. And choose your words to convey that you are informed and respectful. It is an old but proven speaker’s trick to deepen your voice a bit. Lower voices are perceived as being more mature and in control.
Nearly everyone has an inner child who shows up when we’re angry. Anyone who has parented a toddler knows that rule one is to remain calm. People feel out of control and a little unsafe when in mid-tantrum. If you can maintain your calm, control the situation, and guide both of you to a good solution, your client will relax.
What Should You Say?
Here are the basic steps to take when calming down an angry client:
- Express empathy (e.g., I can tell how upset it made you).
- Get clarification of the problem (ask gentle fact-finding questions).
- Apologize (even if you are not in the wrong).
- State that you want to help.
- Probe for more information.
- Repeat the client’s concern back to him to make sure you understand (and so that they feel “heard.”)
- Show you value him as a client.
- Explain possible options for resolution and ask what they’d like to have happen.
- Summarize the actions you agree to (yours and the client’s).
- End pleasantly.
If you have kept your head and reached an agreement about resolving the issue, then congratulations. You win!
Image © istockphoto.com.
Getting Clients: An Essential Guide for Lawyers Starting Out or Starting Over
BY MERRILYN ASTIN TARLTON
The biggest obstacle to building a book of business (besides more time!) is knowing where to start. Getting Clients makes that the easiest part, with straightforward and knowledgeable guidelines, worksheets and the necessary sense of humor.
Related Articles on Attorney at Work
Emotional Triggers: What’s Behind Those Outbursts of Anger and Fear?
Five Ways to Leave Your Lawyer At Work
When Clients Get Angry About Results
The Misguided Appeal of the Aggressive Lawyer
“Seven Ways Lawyers Can Reduce Clients’ Stress”
“Ways to Show Clients You Care”
“Opportunity in Crisis: Innovative Ways Law Firms Are Stepping Up Client Relationships”
